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A dash of narcissism and a pinch of voyeurism and voila!

Monday, May 31, 2010

1/23/10 - "The Pregnancy Chronicles: Week 30"


So I'm at the 30th week. I weigh 146 pounds, which is a clean 30 more than I weighed before this. I'm okay with it. Apparently I'll lose between 16-20 pounds just giving birth. That'll give me about 10 (or 20 when I'm done lol) to lose after. I think (although i've been slack on the photos) I might keep the photos going as an informative "how the hell does this work" chronicle so we can see what in the world happens with a body afterward. Of course, I say that now... but who can be sure. The funny thing is that i still have "thin" days where I feel like maybe i've not gained enough. Shows you that perspective is everything. What's also funny is that i'm running into stuff. Not because my balance is off (which it is), but because i misjudge spaces that i used to be able to fit through. Like the space between someone standing at the sink and the kitchen table. I used to fit there. lol, now i have to wait. It's increasingly difficult to move. Getting up, sitting on the floor, getting out of the bath tub, turning over in bed... all leave me huffing and puffing and are only made possible via grunts. lol

I've officially met the colostrum on one side (which is the nicest way I know how to put it) and am glad at least half of me will function properly when the baby's here. On the other side, I'm sad that the trophy wife boobs I've been given will actually function as anything other than an accessory. Meh. What can you do? They're all stretch marky now, which is pretty uncool, but then again, it makes practical sense that they would. Again, meh. There are things that I haven't put in here, because my audience is pretty varied. But just know, it's not as pleasant as I make it seem. There are more things that happen. That are grosser.

I was able to sleep for 8.5 hours last night thanks to God, the fetus, and my mom. I feel pretty good today. I know I harp on the negativity of new symptoms and side effects, but for the record, it does feel very purposeful.

I've been reading ahead in my book and learned that i've experienced/been experiencing braxton hicks contractions every once and again. They don't hurt, but they are completely noticeable and not comfortable. They sort of demand attention. Sitting down makes them go away faster. It kind of makes my belly feel like you could bounce a quarter off of it, though. That, to me, is a positive change to the jigglyness that's usually there.

She moves a lot and is stronger. My least favorite is when she starts doing pullups with my ribs. My most favorite is when she kicks my arm off my stomach. I've been trying to video it, but she won't do it when i get the camera. Apparently, she just doesn't do requests.

I'm down to one pair of maternity jeans left. Good bye old navy 2's and hello target 2's. The problem's my thighs and knees. All my pants have shrunk at my thighs and my knees. I smell a conspiracy.

There's been mild panic about my sister's wedding come up (May 1st - Go Steph!) because of the dress size situation. Its difficult to get fitted for a dress when you'll have made a person since the fitting. It's also difficult to get fitted for a dress when I refuse to drive to the dress store. lol. We shall see, we shall see.

What's fun is that in February there's a bachelorette party (I'll be at 35 weeks) and I get to bring Jim just in case I go into labor. This is all assuming that the doctor says i'm okay to go. I plan on bringing the labor suitcase and birth plan and car seat just in case lol. There's no better way to ruin the freedom of being a single woman than introducing a mucous plug into the mix of shot glasses and dancing (not that i'll be doing either of those, but still). Buzz Kill! At least i'm invited. I'm excited about it. Of course, I say that now. lol

There's also going to be a Shower(s) at the end of February for my sister's wedding and the baby. It's very inclusive and everyone's invited. Of course, you can't stay at my house though. Steph's already claimed the free space.

Also, That whole people touching my belly thing doesn't bother me a bit. I like being pet. Always have. :D

So i think that's it for now. I'll close with some funny things i've read in my baby book:

FACT: By the time I give birth, my uterus will be 1000x its original size. Seriously.
FACT: During this trimester, since my joints are so lubricated and loose, it can cause my feet to spread. Permanently. As in forever. As in farewell current shoe inventory. Yikes.
FACT: It takes forever to recover from c-section. Insert fear here. Let's all cross our fingers for me pushing through labor like a big girl and not having any complications.

QUOTE: (the book has quotes from other pregnant women so you know what it's like for other people) "I'm at week 28 and still running three miles, four times a week." -Amy
Well, good for you Amy, good for you. I'll stick to my sitting and hating you, thank you very much.

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